I am so freaking sad I can't stand it. This feeling inside is awful. Today, I look at your picture Shirley and I burst into tears. I can feel you, I can hear you, I can even see you sometimes.
Today is my birthday. A day that I did not want to come. I have been dreading it for weeks. When Shirley turned 41, she did not know she would die when she was 42. Shirley would always start counting down my birthday about a month before. The last couple of years she would make me dinner and we would eat on her deck and finish the evening drinking and telling stories from our past. She knew I loved to do that. When I turned 30, Shirley and I went to Worlds of Fun together, just the two of us. And we rode every single ride out there. We were afraid we were getting old...so we had something to prove. We were so sick at the end of the day.
So I am just going to try to get through today. I never imagined a birthday without her.
My parents called and sang to me this morning, Tom Francis called to say happy birthday, Jake, Alex and Sammy called and sang to me. Those things make it better. And lunch with Kathy today. I have missed her and can't wait to see her. And of course Chinese.
I love my family and friends. Teresa:)
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