Founder of Special Olympics has died:(

For those who did not know...my daughter has participated in Special Olympics. So I am sad that she has died. I am sure that Eunice Kennedy Shriver is better known for being JFK's sister, but I think she must have been a really good person to create an organization like the Special Olympics.

Kelsey has participated in Cheerleading and Gymnastics and always has done really well. When Shirley got sick, I cut out as much as I could in my life to be there for her. And that was one thing that we stopped doing. Aunt Shirley would always come and see Kelsey perform. It will be hard...but I think maybe we should start again.

Love,

Teresa

Sadness is Sometimes Overwhelming...

and I just can't take it. I don't want to feel this way anymore. I just want her to come back so we can have fun like we used to. I was trying to think how I would explain to somebody what I am feeling and it's basically this...the most comfortable person that I could be around, I could 100% be myself. It didn't matter what I looked like, skinny or fat, sloppy or neat, hair done or not done, I could be me. And she would love me no matter what. I knew she was not looking AT me. I knew that if I wanted to do something with her, she would want to do it too. I could hug her or touch her and not think twice about it. That would be o.k. Anything I needed to talk about, no matter how small or big, she was really interested. She knew every single thing about me. I know for a fact there are things that only she knew about me. Not one other person in this entire world knew the things about me that she knew. And...she thought I was funny. I could make her laugh without even trying. That may be my favorite thing about Shirley:)

So I am going to sit here in my desk today and feel sorry for myself. And cry. I will try again tomorrow.

Love,

Teresa

Yes, I am Alive!!!!

I had no idea camping was so much fun. I actually enjoyed setting up my tent and cooking over the fire. I cooked everyone the bacon and eggs yesterday morning and it turned out delicious. They had us in a spot that was completely covered by trees so it was cool the entire time. At night we actually had to use our sleeping bags. At night, we would spend girl time around the camp fire. Saturday we were on the river floating for about 6 hours. And that was my favorite part. I love the water, I love the sun, I love nature. I am burnt and sore today, but hey, I'm 41. Not as young as I used to be. And yet, I am ready to go again.

It was awesome to go with the girls from work, but I was so happy Kelly went with me. I know I would not have enjoyed it as much as I did without her. We work really well together. In more ways than one. By yesterday, we were both ready to just come home. We missed our families.

I think I am done taking trips for awhile. No more until Mexico in January.

I am really proud of myself. There were several times I could have become a big crybaby this weekend. There was alcohol, girl talk, campfire....Shirley entered my mind a lot. But instead, I told the funniest Shirley story ever and made everyone laugh. Most of you know the funny Shirley story which involves Kohl's. It felt good to laugh instead of cry. I will tell Shirley stories for the rest of my life.

There was also a lot of snoring going on in the campsite. Definitely brought back Shirley memories.

Now, on with the rest of the week....grrrrr!!!!

Love,

Teresa

Hmmmmm....

"Your willingness to recover and rebuild reflects the very best of what your loved one has given you".

I just read that on the website I get on for bile duct cancer. It's a support group type of website and it does help. I just don't know if quotes like that help me or not. I do think about it a lot when I read them. But when I try to figure out if it is helping or not, I always realize that the huge pain that I feel is still there. The tremendous feeling of loss and hurt. So I don't think it does help. I already know that Shirley left me with a million memories that make me feel good and laugh and cry. But that doesn't make me feel better that she is gone. I wish I was that type of person that it would help. But it doesn't.

When I get extremely sad, I really do try to remember the funny things she did. Which, as we all know, go on forever. It does make me laugh.

Funny thing...when I woke up this morning to see if I had packed everything I needed. I wondered if I should pack one of my pictures of her. When I am at home, she surrounds me in a million pictures in my house. When I am at work, her picture sits right in front of me. So I see her and think about her every single day. I am now going camping, and I won't have that. So, of course, ....I packed a picture:)

Wish me luck on the camping trip. The hottest weekend of the year of course. I will report back on Monday ....hopefully!!!!!

Love,

Teresa

P.S. Jesse (Kathy's daughter) is in a pageant this weekend!!! Good luck Jesse!!!! Aunt Teresa

loves you.

One More Day ....

until camping!!!! I am really excited. It is supposed to be really hot but that's o.k. It will be great on the water.

Today is Bea's birthday!!! Happy Birthday Bea. Hopefully Timmy and the kids will do something really special for you. You deserve it.

Not much else going on. Jakie comes home from mom and dad's today. I think I am ready. I don't like to go too long without them home.

Have a great day!!!

Love,

Teresa

How to Make a Dog Come To You....

would be a good thing to teach a bad dog. He escaped out the front door this morning as I was leaving for work. Prancing just as happy as he could be. No way was he coming to me...I would just put him back in the house. I spent the next 45 minutes chasing him. By the time I was done, I was sweating like a pig, I was dirty and exhausted. I was sure when I did get a hold of him, somebody would call the Humane Society on me for abusing my dog. Luckily two German Shepherds caught his attention and when they started barking at him, he got scared. I grabbed him with everything I had and I was not letting go. I think he walked a block on his back two feet. All I know, as we were walking, I had two hands on his collar, he was standing up and we were eye to eye, with me yelling and lecturing the entire time. I'm sure this would have made a great You Tube Video. Grrrrr....

O.K., now that is out of the way. We are five days into August and the weather for this summer has been great. Nice and cool. So now it starts to heat up...the weekend I am going camping. Yuck!!!!

I talked to mom today and she is having a good time with the kiddos. She has Jake, Sam and Alex this week. She said Sammy is such a sweet girl. They are baking and playing games. The boys I am sure not so sweet. But I think they are helping dad out a little. When she told me how sweet Sam and Alex are, I told her that is the one thing Shirley did best...be a momma. She was a great mom and those kids are proof. They look like her, they have a lot of her personality and just all around good kids. Thank God we have them.

Love,

Teresa

Bad Dog Has A Flea....

Grrrrr.....bad dog. So yesterday morning...we were up and giving the flea bag a flea bath. And washing everything in the house. I don't think it worked. I think he still has a flea. So two pictures are of the wet dog and two pictures are after I brushed the crap out of him. He was not happy...and he was worn out after we were done.

It was a good weekend. We spent Friday night and Saturday night hanging out with Tim and Bea. This Mexico trip should not have any problems at all as much planning as we are doing. Well, not really planning...just talking. Getting more excited!!!!

This weekend I will leave on Friday and go on a little float trip with some girlfriends. I hope we survive. I don't think any of us really know how to camp so it should be interesting. Wish us luck!!!!

One of the funniest stories I ever heard about camping was when Shirley and Mike went camping and Brandon went with them. I think the story goes that in the middle of the night they thought they were being attacked by a bear or wild animals....but no...it was just Aunt Shirley snoring. I never, ever thought I would say this in my entire life...or would I have a reason to say it...but I miss her snoring:(

It's Monday...again...I hope you all have an awesome week!

Love,

Teresa