Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head...

and I love it. I love the rain. Well...I really like sleeping in the rain. But I don't get to do that today. That's o.k. because I will be lunching with Miss Kathy today!!! Yea!!!!

I was trying to think of a good memory of Shirley to write today. I'm super busy at work so it's going to be a short one..but a good one.

Shirley was very stubborn. And Shirley said whatever she was thinking. I really liked that about her most of the time. Last year at this time, Shirley had invited me to a bonfire/Halloween party that her friends Kristi and Paige were having. And I had said yes that I would go and we were both taking our kids. Now, I do not like Halloween at all. It's in the way of my real holidays...o.k. I got sidetracked. The day of the party, I was exhausted. I did not feel like going at all. I knew Mike would be going so I thought it would be o.k. if I backed out. So, I made the phone call. It went like this:

Teresa: "Hey Shirley"
Shirley: "Hi...Do not even think about not going tonight".
Teresa: "I'm not. I was just calling to see how you are doing".
Shirley: "Fine. We will pick you up around 7:00".
Teresa: "O.K. See you tonight".

It was clear that I did not have a choice. And of course looking back...thank God I went. We had a blast. She did great that night. Stayed out pretty late and the kids of course loved it.

I have no idea why that conversation has stuck with me, but it makes me laugh every time. And I still have no idea why she insisted on me going. She was not normally like that. But I love her for making me go. We got a few really good pictures together. And I can still remember sitting in front of that fire next to her...and knowing that I loved her more than anything in the world.

Thank you Shirley:)

Love,

Teresa

Friends and Family

I have to say that I am in a really good place in my life with my friends and family. I'm pretty sure that I have always limited myself on friends because that was never a big necessity in my life. Shirley completely filled that void for me. I always had a partner to do things with if I needed someone. I know that my mother feels that way too. I know Shirley was there a lot for her too. I think that was one of Shirley's purposes here on this Earth. And now we are being forced to go outside of our comfort zone and find it somewhere else. I must tell you that my friends and family have definitely done their part in helping fill that void. My mom calls me all of the time and rarely do I have time to even talk to her. I hate that. I hate being so busy that I don't have time to even talk on the phone. But that's really how my life is. My lunches with Kathy never happened before. And now I almost go through withdrawal when I haven't seen her or talked to her for a few days. I spend time with Tim and Bea that I never had in the past. Our drinking nights at Arizona are great therapy. Cindy always knows when I need a little extra support. She always sends it right when I need it. She makes me feel very loved. And when I started putting out invitations to bunco, I realized how many friends I have. And believe me when I say, that has never been the case. Like I said, I never felt that need to have a group of friends. But now that I have them, I love it. And I need them. It's amazing what you are given to help deal with the worst tragedy in your life.

I don't mean this in a bad way at all, and I am sure everyone understands, but I would give it all up in one second to have Shirley back. I was so spoiled with her. She just gave me whatever I needed. In a sister and a friend.

Here at work, we are of course discussing the snow season that is approaching. It is bringing back a lot of stressful memories from last year. I do all of our snow billings and it was just awful last year when I would be sitting with Shirley when she was sick and see it start to snow. Oh well, that is a discussion for another day.

So I want to say today...Friends...and you know who you are...thank you for being there for me. And family...I love you more than anything in the world even though I may not show it nearly as well as you all do.

Have a nice fall day:)

Love,

Teresa

Country Singer Chris Ledoux

died from bile duct cancer. I knew he had cancer but I just found out today that he died from bile duct cancer. And so did Walter Payton (Chicago Bears football player) which I did already know.

Just interesting...

Teresa:)

Don't Worry About Me...

Why did she have to go
So young I just don't know
why Things happen half the time
Without reason without rhyme

Lovely, sweet young woman
Daughter, wife and mother
Makes no sense to me
I just have to believe

She flew up to Heaven on the wings of angels
By the clouds and stars and passed where no one sees
And she walks with Jesus
and her loved ones waiting
And I know she's smiling saying
Don't worry 'bout me

Loved ones she left behind
Just trying to survive
And understand the why
Feeling so lost inside

Anger shot straight at God
Then asking for His love
Empty with disbelief
Just hoping that maybe

She flew up to Heaven
on the wings of angels
By the clouds and stars and passed where no one sees
And she walks with Jesus and her loved ones waiting
And I know she's smiling saying
Don't worry 'bout me

It's hard to say goodbye
Her picture in my mind
Will always be of times I'll cherish
And I won't cry 'cause

She flew up to Heaven on the wings of angels
By the clouds and stars and passed where no one sees
And she walks with jesus and her loved ones waiting
And I know she's smiling saying
Don't worry 'bout me
Don't worry 'bout me
Don`t worry 'bout me

I love this song....

Love,

Teresa

Toy Story

How cute is that!!! We had a great Saturday evening with Nik, Jake, Alex and Kelsey seeing Toy Story Double Feature in 3-D. It's awesome to spend the evening with our teenagers. These three boys have such a good time together. Alex spent the night too so it made Aunt Teresa's whole weekend:) He has so many qualities of Shirley in him...it's almost like I get to spend a little time with her. I try to hug and kiss him as much as I can ....and he never, ever backs away. I know Shirley would want me to give him the love that he is missing from her.

And the kids don't remember this, but whenever we would get together on a weekend or an evening, they would watch the Toy Story videos. Time marches on...

Bunco again on Friday...looking forward to that.

Love,

Teresa

October 2, 2008

Shirley and I found out we were going to Tina Turner. I remember feeling really excited...and really sad. I know deep down it was the last concert we would ever go to. And it was.

I was so worried that she would not feel good. She had chemo that week and normally she would not be up for a concert. But she did it. She danced the night away.

So...the weekend is here again...Yay!!!!

We are planning bunco again for next Friday and mom's birthday is this month. So we do have a busy month in the works.

No bad dog stories lately...which is kind of disappointing isn't it? He might get to go to the dog park at some point this weekend, so I am sure we will come up with something.

Love,

Teresa

Bus Stop

Every morning when I leave for work, I see 5 or 6 kids down the street waiting for the school bus. When we were little, for a short time we lived in the house that Shirley lived in for the past however many years. And we would wait at the bus stop right outside her house. When I looked at these kids this morning, two of the little girls were doing cheers. We used to do the exact same thing. And of course...Shirley would tell you that I would sing to her every day at the bus stop. And she was the one person I would sing the song to that would become the song I danced to at my wedding. I told her all the time at the bus stop, that would be my wedding song. And it was.

Those are things that her and I shared that I loved. The funny thing is, I have never really just sang to anyone else. I did it to her because she would just roll her eyes at me and make the funny face. As kids you do things to bother your brother or sister...but as adults, I did it because it was something that made us laugh.

I will say I have kind of a weird feeling in the pit of my stomach knowing the holidays are right around the corner. But I know it will all be o.k.

It's awesome outside today!!! I love this weather.

Love,

Teresa

P.S. I just remembered something I had to add after I posted this. Most of the time when I would be singing to Shirley or if a song would come on the radio...she would also try to start singing. Unfortunately she hardly ever would know the words...and the running joke with Kathy, Shirley and I was that Shirley should not sing...if you know what I mean. And we would all just crack up ... I mean really none of us could sing...but for some reason it just stuck that Shirley was the worst singer ever and that was funny to us. It didn't take much...